I've heard about dentists giving their patients laughing gas or Xanax or whatever for routine teeth cleanings. Apparently that all happens in some mythical land, because my dentists have always wielded their little icepicks and Dremels with gleeful abandon, never once offering any relief to their suffering charge unless I was getting the whole damn tooth pulled. I don't understand why they would withhold standard-issue pain medication during an uncomfortable, semi-traumatic procedure, while general practitioners break open fentanyl piñatas to any old coal miner holding his hand out. Big Pharma, get your ass in here and DO SOMETHING.
The way I deal with it is by thinking of a countdown timer. Let's say I have 25 more years to live. That makes 50 trips to the dentist total. So next time I go in for a cleaning I can say:"Ha ha, 1 down, 49 to go, then you'll never be able to hurt me again, you horrible, sadistic piece of shit.
Issue: 12-3 (orig. pub. date: )
